errrrrrrrrrrrrr. i hate blogger

Aish. Every time I plan to write in my journal, Lester always keeps me from writing. He came over tonight and cooked dinner. Then Grant called and I was preoccupied for a while. Then Lester finally left once Leno came on. Oh wells, better than just moping around the house by myself. Thanks Lester..it was yummy. ^_^

Actually, I take that back.

If I were back home I'd have afternoon tea at the Pineapple Room AND have a romantic dinner with Grant at Alan Wong's Restaurant.

*sigh* If I were back home, I would go have afternoon tea at Alan Wong's Pineapple Room.

Everyday friggen day:
-wake up at 6
-shower
-go back to sleep for about 20 more minutes in my nice warm bed while listening to the Woody show on 95.7
-hurridly dress [its freakin cold!]
-kitchen..pack lunch/breakfast
-out the door by 7:20
-speed walk 10-15 min. to Ashby Bart
-25 min ride on SF Colma Bart [spend half of it staring at CBG1, 2 & 3 ;P]
-off at Montgomery
-at work by 815
-log on, check email, surf the journals
-start doing actual work at 9
-work, work, blah, blah
-leave by 5
-bart...walk...home before 6.
-veg
-sleep

bleh. I need more excitement in my life. boohar

Ok, as of today Cute BART Guy#2 becomes CBG#1. Also, there are now Cute Bart Guys 2 & 3, although #3 isn't THAT cute, but he has potential. hehe. Yep, lucky me. They all ride on one end of the car and all get off at Embarcadero. heehee ^_^

You know what I just remembered? How Korean families celebrate New Year's with Se Bae [new year's bowing] and Se Baet Don [new year's money given mostly to the younger kids for bowing]. Oh how I felt soooooo robbed when I first learned about that tradition in my 4th semester of Korean. I mean, sure, who really cares about the bowing and showing respect, but if its for money I would do it! Dang Americanized family. haha.

Something I've learned over the past year: Nothing is really as bad as it first seems. Yes, you may want to stress and cry and bitch and whine and go on a muderous rampage when you first find out your bad, stressful, or worrisome news, but don't. Don't because when you wake up the next morning or a few days later, you will see how foolish you were for creating a big ordeal out of nothing. This is what I've learned and now I'm passing on this important peice of information to you. Use it wisely my children. ;P

aigoo...bad news for my sweetie at the beginning of his year. He apparently misunderstood the terms of his cell plan. We await the hideousness of the first bill. Poor thing is stressing too much especially with all the bills this upcoming month. I worry. What to doing. =/

I got chills they're multiplying
And I'm losing control
Cause the power you're supplying
It's Electrifying!

You better shape up cause I need a man
And my heart is set on you
You better shape up, you better understand
To my heart I must be true

You're the one that I want (You are the one I want) ho ho ho honey
You're the one that I want (You are the one I want) ho ho ho honey
You're the one that I want( You are the one I want) ho ho ho honey
The one that I need oh yes indeed

If you're filled with affection
You're too shy to convey
Meditate in my direction
Feel your way

I better shape up, cause you need a man (I need a man)
Who can keep me satisfied
I better shape up, if I'm gonna prove (you better prove)
That my faith is justified
Are you sure? Yes I'm sure down deep inside

You're the one that I want (You are the one I want) ho ho ho honey
You're the one that I want (You are the one I want) ho ho ho honey
You're the one that I want (You are the one I want) ho ho ho honey
The one that I need oh yes indeed
-from the movie Grease
heehee

I'm starting to get melancholy now. I don't know why. Maybe its because Grant didn't call at his turning of the new year. Maybe its because I'm listening to these songs that I used to drown my sorrows in earlier this year. Maybe its because I spent these holidays relatively alone. Or maybe its just because I'm tired. I should sleep now. jal ja!

My first post of the new year. Whee!

Man, I have this urge to blow up stuff. I need to get my pryo tendencies out dangit! Not fair. =(

Boohar. Lester is over to ring in the new year with me but he's being quite boohar. Sorry Lester, but right now I wish i could kick you. hehe

Aigoo..i just found out my bio page was that awful page full of pics that I thought I had deleted! I must've accidentally loaded the wrong page and its been like that for the last 2 months! *hinding in shame* eek. how ucky. >.<

hehe. Lester's got a new site. Looks kinda familiar huh. haha Tres cool.

WOO! Helen is back! Yay!

*sigh* So much on my mind, so little motivation to write. I meant to last night, but pity got the better of Dave and he offered me kim chi jjigae and tivo-ed Friends episodes. How could I pass that up? When I finally did come home I was on the phone with Grant then got really tired, said goodbye and fell asleep with all the lights and heater on. Not good, especially when I didn't set my alarm clocks and I still needed to pack for my outing with Rose tonight.

Yep, so I woke up 5 minutes before I was supposed to leave the house. I amaze myself sometimes when I calmly rush instead of freaking out. hehe. I showered, changed, packed, turned off everything, and ran to the bart station. That's one thing I hate about my commute, I can't drive to the station. erk. oh wells. I got there with 2 minutes to spare. Yeah, I'm good. =)

My hunger finally got the better of me as I walked past Yank Sing. erk. [Its so annoying to know that its just downstairs so I can still be a lazy ass at lunch heh] There goes the hope of not spending too much money on eating out. But see, the problem is that I have no leftovers to bring for lunch [yes, its ghetto but I'm a poor bastid so I'm entitled. hehe].

Living alone provides no motivation to cook whatsoever. My refrigerator is so bare, save the cookies my aunt sent me and a few bottles of assorted juices, so I can't cook much anyway. Maybe I should make the frozen potstickers that I remembered last night, but I can't live on that for the next 2 weeks.

I'm planning to go grocery shopping today, but I honestly have no idea what to buy. Its not so fun cooking for one. There's no more good roommate to say "Maria, you cook the best dinners." Boohar. That's the best part! I just have to keep telling myself "Just 2 more weeks, just 2 more weeks. Don't get malnourished. Just 2 more weeks."

I think I'm still suffering from post-vacation depression. It wasn't even really a vacation, just an extended weekend. *sigh* My days are so unporductive now, even when I have so much shtuff to do. Work sucks.

ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH!!!!!!!!

oldnavy.com sucks. erg. they let me use an expired promotional code and now I don't get my $10 off. Fuck. And then I also have this other code but I can apply it to my order since its already been processed. Boohar. Oh well. For any of you who are planning to buy something from them here's the code: TENOFFJA and that gets you $10 off a $50 purchase [expires 1/31/01]. yep yep. Bastids. erk

Boohar. i miss the good roommate. Home is so boring. And now I realize...I'm not doing anything on New Year's Eve. Yep. Just me and the TV...oh, and Grant on the phone. Heh. Woopie

Why am I always the one to suffer? Not only is my busy time of the month approaching, but the receptionist is out. And THEN! She forgot to order a cake for one of our coworkers' bdays so I'm forced to order it and pick it up all the way at 3Embarcadero! Hrmm, what else? Oh yes, and we have no more forks so I'm probably going to have to go buy some. Am I supposed to do this all during my lunch break? Fuck. I have shit to do too you know. The evil coworker thinks I'm all pissy because the receptionist is out "YET AGAIN", but little does she know that its really her If-its-not-my-job-then-I-won't-even-so-much-as-help-you attitude that's sending me into this boiling fury. ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRGHHHHHHHHHHH >.<

heehee. Got the webcam set up.
eek! Just pretend like you don't see the mess behind me.
oops. ;P

Whew! Who knew shopping could be so exhausting? hehe. Actually, I already knew that, but dang so many people! So many people that there was basically nothing in my size! I got lucky though. I got the shiny stretch boot cut pants I wanted along with my blue eye shadow from sephora and lots of nice underwear on sale. Add to that 3 belated Christmas cards and $50. Life is good. =)

Reason number 108 why my company sucks:

We have to work the day after Christmas. >.<

Not really in the happy spirit of Christmas anymore. My journal entry is all incoherent and weird. I hate when my head is so full of thoughts that I can't portray my thoughts the right way. >.< Anyway, I'm really digging this song "One in a Million" by Bosson from the movie Miss Congeniality. Its cool. That and the line "I'm gorgeous, you want to kiss me." hehe. You know its true ;P

Reason #57 why my company sucks this year:

Normally we're let out early the day before all major holidays/days off. We got out at 1 before thanksgiving, and also before Labor Day. One would think the same would apply for Christmas. Home office in DC got out at 12..yet here we are still slaving away at 1. This place sucks! No appreciation for all the work the people here do [note: i'm not talking about myself cuz God only knows how I don't do jack. hehe].

And on top of all this we were told not to take any vacation time around this time because its the busy season until next month, and guess who took half the week off? Yep, the same people who told us not to. hmph! so rude.

Oh well, I made sure I got to leave early. Heehee. BAI YALL!

Hawaii teachers are seriously underpaid, especially with the crappy facilities they have to endure. I Hate [with a capital H] the governor who never seems to give a shit about education. I'm hoping that the negotiations turn out well, and if they do, then just maybe I would more seriously consider teaching there instead.

I never knew a matress pad could make such a difference! My bed is now even softer and cozier than it was before! Needless to say, I had a very nice sleep.

In other news, the evil roommate leaves for home today. I won't be seeing her for about a month. Life is good.
I was surprised to find that she actually left me a gift [a gc to gap] on the table. I left hers there before I went to work. Yeah, aren't we all mushy and personal with the gift giving. heh.

I leave for LA tomorrow! yippie! My first trip ever to LA. All this talk about Santa Monica is making me antsy. heehee. Three days of Christmas bliss. ^______^

I've been sleep deprived for 3 days and I was literally a zombie all day today at work. So why in the name of God am I drinking a can of Mountain Dew at 11:30pm? Yes, I'm a retard. ...but I was thirsty!

yes! blogspot is back. the bastids.

I finally saw the Cute BART Guy #1 tthis morning. I haven't seen him in like 3 months since the first time I saw him. Although now I realize he really isn't that cute after all. I can definitely see which of his features I find attractive, but overall, he's not all that. Still...eye candy is yummy. =) I still see Cute Guy #2 on a daily basis...maybe I should promote him to CG#1. hehe

Oh..and today when I was getting ready to get off at Montgomery, this one chick was being so rude and was forcing her way through to the door. She bumped me and didn't even apologize. Hmph! I'm just like "dude, where's the fire?" Rude people suck.

It was the cutest thing!

We were talking on his cell phone when he got another call on his home phone. He goes "Baby, hold on kay?" Then he answers it and goes "Oh! Wassaaap!" I guess he realized who it was because he then started speaking in Japanese. He sounded so cute!!! It was the first time I ever heard him speaking in a whole conversation. I just about melted because it was so adorable! I definitely have to keep him now. ^_^

Gosh I hate Mondays. I'm so glad its time to go home now. =P

Papercuts really REALLY suck. Especially ones that bleed and bleed like there's a never ending supply of blood, and ones that are caused not by paper, but by thick cardboard file folders. I suppose I should call it a cardboard cut instead.

Needless to say, yes, my finger hurts like a mofo.

Umm...things are getting quite strange these days. I suppose its because of the new movie Dungeons & Dragons that is out now that more people are searching for Justin Whalin on the net. Unfortunately for me, my site comes up in the search just because I mentioned him ONE freaking time. haha. I think its hilarious actually. And this morning I receive an email from some girl wanting to know what I had said about him because she looked all over my archives and couldn't find the post and its driving her crazy not knowing. hahahaha This cracks me up.

ERRRRRRRR!!!!!

The evil roommate has been on the phone for FOR-EVER! Sundays are normally my days. =( boohar. This isn't fair.

yay! My baby gets his phone today and will commence using up the 2600 minutes on me tonight! *beaming* I want to be the first person he calls. hehe I'm so selfish. *grin*

Oh its so adorable! Glenda sent me the coolest ecard! It was so fun launching snowballs at elves. So devious. =) She even said "boohar!" hahaha

She ended it with "hope you have a mar-ry xmas!! :)" hahaha. So cute! Thank you gg! =)

arg! why do people keep calling my site "mar's journey?!"

its NOT a journey. am i on a journey? i don't think i am. what if i wanted it just to be like a quick jaunt to the local store...that's not a journey

heehee. I'm not complaining though. I think its cute that people don't get it right. I should use this as an excuse to extend a friendly email to certain fellow journallers. But its sooo hard! heehee

FYI: its Journiary...JournIARY. Jour•ni•a•ry (jur-NAI-AH-rhee)...you know like "Journal" merged with "Diary"? ^___^

I'm so thankful its friday. now I can get fucked up at rose's housewarming party. woowoo! =P

There is always irony in my life.
On the one day that I decide to bring my umbrella to work [after walking home in the rain this whole week] it is beautifully sunny outside.
I think the gods just like fucking with me. heh

On a side note, I discovered yesterday that my jacket really stinks. blech

Finally! Done!

I can now resume my life.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled programming.

=( boohar
well...maybe next year =(

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

they won game three! there IS a god!

ok...if UH loses before its time for me to go home I think I'm going to scream. >.<

YES! Ten points in a row....this redeems them for losing game 2. =p

WAH!! Hawaii is losing!
It took me a whole hour to find the live web update and I am shocked to see they lost game one 15-3!! Game 2 is a little better...but dang...my coworkers must be wondering what all the racket is. OOH! 13-10...UH is coming back! 13-11! WOOHOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Tomorrow our company is apparently having our Christmas party. This is what sucks:
1. It is in the office.
2. It is catered by Briazz.

Briazz? WTF? In the office? So i suppose that means we don't get out early or anything.

So while the marketing department flitters away money on exorbitant items like new furniture, gift lighters, and countless golf tournaments, we are made to suffer. Do we mean that little to them?

Last year they supposedly went to a Greek restaurant. This year I suppose we should be grateful for the new copier. woopie.

*nervous*
Today Hawaii plays unbeaten Nebraska in the semifinals of the Final Four. They haven't won the championship since '87. I reeeeeeeeeeally hope they win. Just 4 hours till game time.
*fidgeting*

I'm getting extremely stressed. The postmark deadline is tomorrow and I still haven't finished my essay. I had set a personal deadline of today but I guess that isn't going to happen. My essay really stunk and my "favorite assistant number only" was kind enough to rip it to shreds. I'm in dire need of a final paragraph, yet I don't have the revised version with me at the moment to work on it. *sigh* I guess my computer must hate me now since it didn't save properly. Maybe its a sign. heh

Yeah...my journal is really starting to suck since i don't update. Not my fault! [Nothing ever is. hehe. Grant accepts it, so should you]

Its funny how it seems so surreal to not be stressing over finals though. I actually kinda miss it. o.O

Oooh...the 8250. Nice. Why don't I live in the Asia Pacific region. dammit

2600 minutes. Damn. That's like 43 hours. Do you know what you can do in that amount of time? But still, I'm sure I could easily talk to Grant in that amount of time plus some. I think its so cute that my baby is gonna get the 8290. I told him "You are NOT getting the 5190. Don't even think about it buster." hehe. What? Is it my fault that after my trip to Korea I found the Nokias excessively bulky [fat] and unpleasant to the eyes [ugly]? Grant is so cute. =)

You would think it would be easy writing about why I want to be a teacher and why I am pursuing graduate studies. But it is the way in which this information is presented that proves most difficult for therein lies the key...the key to bs right past the admission board and into a 2 year routine of torture.

Why am I doing this again?

So the lunch box is lost forever...but I've come to a realization: Such trivial things - chopsticks, lunchboxes, and the like - aren't worth getting worked up over. Why get upset when I still have so much to be happy about? I wish others could feel the same way I do. I apologize for being such a selfish child and I pray for all those who are not as fortunate this holiday season.

Boohar...I discovered this morning that I lost my lunch bag. I looked in my room, I looked in the kitchen, and then I realized "hey, I didn't come home with it last night did I." I remember having it on BART but I don't recall carrying it while running home in the rain. "AH! I must've left it at the post office!" Lets just hope they have a lost and found and its there. Otherwise I'll have to mourn the loss of a lunch bag, and that's something I reeeeally don't want to do. heh

erg! of all times! tammy is in the shower now and i need my toothbrush! woooo fun. I wonder how I should pass the time. dudidu

Okay...see what happens when I start listening to ballads! Time to sleep. Jal ja!

This is, and will always remain, the most important picture to me. The two people I love and respect the most in my life, on the night that changed my life forever.
harabuhji bogo shipuh. =(

Was just reminiscing about old times. *sigh* So many gut wrenching moments I'd like to forget, but then a few happy ones slip into my mind and it almost makes me think it was all worth it.


So happy yet marred by unhappiness.
Is that how high school was meant to be?

Yeeeeeeeeeah!

Am I the only one that really digs Britney's newest release "Stronger"?

'Cause now I'm...

Stronger...than yesterday
Now it's nothing but my way
My loneliness ain't killing me no more
I'm stronger.

Its funny how I can relate to the chorus too. *smiling*

GAH! She is soooooooo annoying! She constantly repeats herself, she persists until you give in and show she's right (even if she isn't), and the way she breathes makes her sound like she has emphazema [even though i doubt she ever smoked]. She is the "evil one" in our office and if it weren't for the fact that she's always giving me nice little snacks all the fucking time I probably would've killed her by now. heh

You know, I'm surprised by the few journals that I couldn't find email addresses for. I thought that would be a given, but I guess some people just don't want to be contacted that way. *shrug* Its all good though. They're cool people and I guess I'll just have to tell them here, "Merry Christmas!" [minus the dancing mice] hehe =)

Wooo...bourbon balls. They're sending me into a tizzy. *giggle*

Boohar.
I miss my baby. *sigh* I hope he calls soon.

And speaking of baby, I find it funny that I can now call Grant "baby" or "babe" with no qualms. I never thought I could ever call anyone "baby" before; it just seemed unnatural for me. Its a good thing now though. =)

And one last baby topic: I find it so adorable that Scott seems to be wondering about 3/4 kids. I remember thinking about that every now and then a long while back. Now? Now I occasionally think about 1/4 white, 1/4 korean, 1/8 Chinese, and 3/8 Japanese kids. hahaha. But I know those aren't for a LOOOOONG time to come if it does ever happen. hehe

Yay! I finished my xmas cards. Now if only I could start my essay. eek

ARGH! I woke up too late to meet my cousins. I haven't even met one of them before so you would think that I would have enough decency to wake up on time. oops. Oh wells. I have to clean the house and get ready to cook anyway. I need to get wrapping paper for Won's gift too! Aiyah. So much to do so little time.

Good shopping.
Good food.
Good conversation.
The night was perfect. ^___^

Yay! YAY!

I get to hang with Rosa bhurd tonight! I dunno what we're doing but I'm meeting her at the Metreon in about 45 minutes.

Woohoo! I actually have a life now!

Oh my F***ing God. If she says "Isn't the tree pretty?!" in her annoying high pitched voice ONE MORE TIME I think I will just have to kick her. >.<

The office got a christmas tree today. Finally! I can now satisfy my need for the "essesnce" or Christmas. To me, without the smell of a douglas fir, it just ain't Christmas.

But still...I want to have a tree of my own. Even if its a measily 2 foot one. *pout*

erg

This application shit is harder than it looks! Its so tedious and complex.
Man, if I can't figure out how to do this then I obviously don't deserve to get in. hehe

I'm pooped.
I overslept this morning. It was actually light outside! yikes. Oh wells, I still got to work on time. erg. I hate work. I'm feeling so lethargic right now and being exhausted doesn't help any.

Tonight me and tammy will be renting a movie. yay! Anna still needs to get her butt over to buy a vcr, but yay for tammy housesitting for someone that does have a vcr! hehe =)

erg. Anna's friend is such a ditz! Just shoot me already. Its like listening to that "Who's on First?" crap, only this isn't funny.

Happy belated bday to Paul, Glenda, and Paul! =)

phew! scanning is a biyotch. but my pics came out really nice! well...the ones with grant did. hehe. ahh..I love pictures =)

YES!
I finally finished the fucking letters. I hate the beginning of the month. I have all this stupid shit to do and its just so mind numbing. err.
But at least I'm done now. Now I can surf and do email. =)

yay! I love shopping online! I just bought stuff at sephora. ahhh...so nice. =)

I hunger.

I'm wearing my favorite top. I got it in korea. Boohar. I wish I could go shopping there again. one day...

Happieeeeeeeeeeeee!

=)
long distance phone calls are so nice
=)

Christmas card time. whee!

I reeeeeeeeeeeeeeally wish today was Friday, or Thursday at the very least. Ugh. Today is going by soo slowly! =/

I wont become all needy and depressed.
I wont become all needy and depressed.
I WONT become all needy and depressed, Dammit!

So yes, its all resolved. =D

I was fearing that I would, but now I'm being proactive to stop it from ever starting. That's how it should be. =P

frick.
I hate when people make me do all this extra work to make their work easier...and then in the end they just pass of their work to me anyway. I mean, how hard is it to sign your name 70+ times? sheesh.
But at least I'm getting better at forging. heh

dudar.
I think I drank too much coke this morning. I feel sick.
bleh.

erg.
Does anyone know how to remove the garlic smell from your hands?
I have a headache. =/

New day.
New week.
God I hope it doesn't end up being a shitty day.

Bored.
Tammy is still sleeping and we're supposed to go xmas shopping.
Already did a little online.
Was bored so I fiddled around with my Amazon Wish List.
I don't expect anyone to send anything. I just think its interesting to see what other people put on theirs. Hope everyone is having fun xmas shopping..I know I am! =)

Currently running on 3.5 hours of sleep and puffy eyes.

CBEST was an insult.
Guy cheating with a dictionary next to me.
So ghetto.
Room was not heated and I shivered through it all.
Finished with 1.5 hours to spare.

Aish...I have so lost faith in all educational systems.
This is the test teachers have to take after all. !!!

boohar.
still no call.
i hate the wait

And did I mention my trip to LA for Christmas?

hehe, Tammy wouldn't let me spend it alone so she will wait for me till Friday and then we're driving down together. I fly back up xmas night.

Gosh...my first trip ever to la. And I get to stay in Tammy's fabulous house too! woohoo!

I just paid off one of my credit card bills.

I haven't written a check that large since I wrote one for tuition at UH. hah.

Then I later found out I had charged something else on that card so I will still have a balance. Damn. There went my moment of pride.

But yes...reducing the debt...only to bring it back up again with xmas shopping. Oh joy.

Boohar.

The waiting always kills me.

1.5 hours till he comes home. *gulp*

oh man. I made a big big mistake. I told Grant something I shouldn't have and now I've hurt him. Why do I have this urge to be so honest with him? too honest for my own good I think. erg. Stupid Stupid

erg. Rushing to stuff a lunch plate full of chinese food down your throat because you came back late from shopping does not make the tummy feel very good. bleh

...but hey, at least i now have a nice new top and scarf. =)

I am still reeling from this happiness.

I can't help but smile. I think I even smiled once while on BART today, but only once. I dunno why but whenever I'm on bart I just have a serious/semi-sad face. Not that I'm sad or anything, there is just not much to be happy about when riding bart. hehe.

Daydreaming is always nice tho...so if you ever see me in a daze on the Richmond bart, you know why. =)

The most awful thing happened to me again this morning.

As I was loading the dishwasher I discovered my pink pair of chopsticks were broken. Not just one of them this time...but BOTH! I took it really well this time though. I was just kinda sad that now I only have one lone blue chopstick left...not even one pink one to mismatch it with.

I left the chopsticks in plain view this time rather than just throwing away the evidence. I'm sure Tammy will sympathize when she sees it and maybe she'll even say something to the other one. Perhaps I should've said something last time. Oh well, no use crying over broken chopsticks. I'll just have to kill her now. haha joking.